Maybe it’s the “Super New Moon in Taurus” or maybe it’s just where I’m at in life but I’ve been questioning so many things about who I am, what I believe, where I’m going, what I’m meant for, what I want, how my life experiences have affected me, who I am today, and more.
It’s no joke when they say “You are not your yesterday” (actually I said that in a 12 step meeting in 2011 or 2012) but the same rings true that who we were 12 months ago is, more than likely NOT who we are today! I know that there are “those few” who never change, but for the most part life changes people! But, even with change, I’ve discovered that there are innate personality characteristics that affect the way we see the world, the decisions we make, our outlook on life, and more.
I’ve talked and written before about an analogy one of my college professors used, “Everyone views what happens in their life through their own perceptions much like they are filming a movie about their life and their eyes are the camera”. Meaning, we all see things differently, experience things differently, learn differently. Why? Because, as we are watching the movie called “My Life” playing on our visual screens we are filtering the images, situations, and chains of events through our belief systems, morals, accumulated life experiences, education, and more…..even down to our geographical area in which we live! And, while you and I may experience the same situation or event none of us have walked the same steps and therefore will not always perceive the situation the same. Maybe our loyalties lie with different people. Maybe I came from an abusive marriage while you had a spouse who adored you. Maybe I had kids young and you waited until you were forty. Maybe my parents are still alive and yours passed away. Maybe I was a nerd and you were popular. Maybe I was poor and you were rich. Whatever the case, those experiences make us who we are and are prerequisites, if you will, of how we will see things in the future!
So, in all of this, I’ve realized there are, at least, four types of people in the world and that these “types” also affect how we perceive things….but more importantly….how we make decisions.
My parents struggled raising me. I was a good, but strong willed child. I was told on more than one occasion (by many people, but for the sake of this blog – my Mom and Dad) that I was a Bitch! Flat out! I’ve been told I’m a control freak, I’m stubborn, and I don’t listen. My Dad, more than my Mom has always tried to give me advice and help me make better decisions than what he made in life – and almost always, to his unrelenting frustration, I would do quite the opposite. He, also, gets mad when I make a decision but it isnt the decision he would have made so it is unacceptable – even if it turns out in my favor! DADS!!! If I hadn’t found Jesus I’m sure my life and many of my decisions would have led me down a destructive path but even with Jesus I’m still a Type 1…….
So, Type 1 – “The Experiencer”. Some people just have to do it on their own! Some people are independent, free spirits and have realized that they don’t learn anything in life by playing it safe or walking the straight and narrow. They learn things by “experiencing”. Right decisions. Wrong decisions. Rewards. Consequences. All of these things are (in essence) valuable to an Experiencer. They want friends and family who will listen to them but they don’t usually take people’s advice. They might be told that they don’t “respect authority” because it doesn’t matter what anyone says…once their mind is made up they are just going to do what they want to do; regardless. Their feelings run very, very deep and most of their decisions are made because they usually follow their heart instead of logical thinking. These people love fiercely and get hurt easily. They don’t always lead the easiest lives, but they, inevitably, will be some of the strongest people you’ve ever met with a willpower you’ve never even imagined. These people don’t stay down! They ALWAYS get back up when they fall. They may or may not lean on a higher power and they may or may not be deemed good leaders. They may be “the glass is half full ” people, “the glass is half empty” people, or they may be “the glass just is” people, but don’t let that fool you. They hold deep down inside a hope beyond all hopes that the best is yet to come! Through their experiences and what they’ve learned on their journey they believe that the sum of what life has dealt them (whether good or bad) will eventually lead to happiness; which is their ultimate goal. They just want to be happy, and this has huge impacts on the decisions they make. These people can sometimes seem like drifters or like they are incapable of making sound decisions, but in their eyes it’s all part of the Experience!
Type 2 – “The Spiritualist”. Whether they are religious or into new age spirituality the Spiritualist ALWAYS believes in things like a higher power (God), fate, karma, the universe, the “Law of Attraction”, and more. These people will either be super peaceful or they will be a force to be reckoned with. This group can easily allow their power of attraction, their sensuality, their luring nature, their energy, or their supernatural abilities make way for a monstrous ego and many (ego or not) have a huge following of fans and supporters. Many of these people believe that everything happens for a reason, they are being guided by something or someone, there is a plan for their life, and/or a purpose. A very few of these people have the ability to make you want to run for the hills, but still, you will NOT ever find a bunch of people more willing to help and heal the world than Spiritualists! They believe in the human life and the wonderousness of forces within themselves, nature, the universe, and the Heavens, and these forces empower them to do great things! These people are usually leaders and other people grasp on to the words they speak, charities they endorse, things they practice, and cool-aid they are serving to have, even just a small piece, of what a Spiritualist has and/or feels.
Type 3 – “The Rule Keeper”. These are the people that ALWAYS play it by the rules. They are very logical thinkers. They are the “Vulcans” of the human race. Their lives are orderly, structured, and have probably been planned out since they were five. They have never broken a law or done anything illegal. They have never skipped school or snuck out of their parents house at night. They drive the speed limit and they do everything with a perfectionist type of attitude. They are very detail oriented. These are usually very educated and successful people. When they find love it’s usually with another “Rule Keeper” who is just as keen on planning as they are and the relationship normally lasts forever because they don’t say “YES” until their mate meets ALL the criteria on their list. These people have a four car garage, with 1.5 children or no children, a nice retirement fund, and probably a hefty 401K. They don’t believe in frivolous behavior because it’s a waste of time. They carefully plan out ALL of their decisions, are usually early but NEVER late, dress on point and appropriately for every occasion, are every parents dream child, and live life as if it’s something to be achieved rather than experienced. Life for them is about goals and more goals.
Type 4 – “The Anything Goeser”. For these people life is a ride. They are like leaves blowing in the wind. These are your party people, your risk takers, and your attention getters. They may be job hoppers and they may never settle down. They live for fun and adventure. They may be completely irresponsible or they may handle their responsibilities but also know how to let loose when the time is right; and boy do they let loose! They don’t make many goals or plans. They probably don’t handle money very well and believe that “I can always make more”! They are either right on time but, more often than not, they are usually late. They don’t RSVP to anything because they don’t want to commit and if they show up it’s because something better didn’t come along! They are light hearted and hate drama! They don’t have time for drama because then life isn’t fun anymore so they will quickly call you out or just walk away. But, truth be told, you will ALWAYS enjoy yourself and have fun in their presence. They live to make people smile and forget about the cares of the world. These people can usually be found at their favorite bar, hangout, friends couch, sporting event, or night life scene on a Friday night after a long work week. Their mantra….”YOLO”, right?
There may be more Personality types and you may identify with more than one. Realistically speaking, life experiences, having kids, jobs, responsibilities, and such make it hard for anyone to be exactly as I’ve described above. Most people have to bend a little to the forces of nature and the luck of the draw. However, these are the things that drive us on a deeper level. So, while Suzy Q and Marky Mark may make a decision that makes you tilt your head sideways, remember that you’re not watching their movie.
There is SO much about me that has changed over the last few years, and even more over the last few months that I find myself examining my life, my feelings, my needs, my goals, my decisions, and more. This realization has helped me understand ME a little more and why I am the way I am; why I do the things I do. You may not like it, but you’re not watching my movie either!
What is your type? If you care to share that is…….